Atalanta did not so much want to be written tonight, that's why you get so much of this, and so little of that.
Luna strummed her fingers along her harp strings as the others around her read or munched on some of the breakfast foods much of the group had brought along in the auditorium. She glanced up, as she saw Deus check his watch for what must have been the fifth time in five minutes.
"You might as well say it," she told him. "The dear king is late to court," she sang.
"I'm just..." Deus grimaced. "Worried. You know he had no way to get home on Friday and there was that terrible storm, and then we couldn't really get out until today, even in Toothless, and he probably couldn't call." Astrid leaned over her boyfriend's shoulder and wrapped her arms around him.
"Relax," she said. "You would think your his boyfriend instead of mine. What else are you worried about?"
"...You know that guy I told you guys about, the one who was looking for Ziggy?" Deus asked.
"Yes," said Merlin, as he and the others leaned in over their books, homework and food.
"Well, you know how Ziggy's also a hopeless romantic?" Deus said.
"Oh, I don't like where this is going," David said. "You think Ziggy brought that guy home with him?"
"It is entirely possible," Gwen retorted. "I mean like Deus said, there was that terrible storm on Friday afternoon, and Ziggy's not the kind to let anyone go out in something like that. So he might make the guy stay, and then maybe get him naked by getting him to change clothes. And you know Ziggy doesn't close doors when he changes."
"I don't think Ziggy would do something so quickly," Percy said. "I mean...unless..."
"Unless what?" Deus asked.
"Yeah, not all of know him as well as you guys," Era pointed out. "So don't leave us in suspense."
"Come on Seaweed, you are no good are thriller," Nico said batting at his cousin.
"Well, if you hang around Ziggy long enough, you learn that his family has strange ideas about soul mates," Percy said.
"Oh yeah," Edmond added, "Jak tells this story about how he met Eviana, and oh my God, it seems a little rediculas sometimes."
"I saw my future with her," Deus and David quoted together.
"Like I said, hopeless romantic," Deus said. "And after the disaster who shall not be named--"
"Why are we talking about Brody?" Ziggy asked, as he walked in, his bag on his hip and a plate in his hand. "Dad made pancakes this morning, so come and get them while they're hot."
"Le Gasp, you said the name of he who shall not be mentioned," Deus said while grabbing a pancake and immeadiately shoving it into his mouth.
"Yeah, so why were you talking about him?" Suddenly everyone was very interested in what they had been doing before. "If anyone's interested I had sex this weekend." Deus chocked on his pancake, while several people feel out of their chairs. "Now does someone what to tell me what was being spoken of before I came in?"
"They were wondering about that very thing," Lance said. "Everyone wanted to know if you slept with him or not."
"Well, I did okay, and I know you all think I'm crazy for it, but yeah it was that magical moment my dad doesn't shut up about sometimes," Ziggy said. "I have a very good feeling about Dillon."
"Did you have a good feeling about Brody?" Merlin asked.
"No really, no," Ziggy said. "More of an enh...."
"Oy, Grover." Down the aisle of the theatre strode Teneya Foster, followed closely by her bitch squad. She climbed the stage steps and tossed something to him, which when unwadded revealed a pair of black boxers. "You left these at our house."
"Tenaya, these are your brother's," Ziggy said, holding them up. "Their like a size too big for me."
"You know most guys wouldn't admit that," Morgana told him.
"Darling, it's not the size side ways I'm interested in," Ziggy said. "Do you ladies have any other business here?"
"It's not like you can kick us out," Susan told him. "It's a free space for all students."
"And she wonders why we named the squad that," Edmund muttered over his work.
"And the wolf howls quite loudly," David remarked, as Dillon stalked after his sister, following by a snickering BA crowd.
"What did you do with my shorts?" Dillon asked.
"Your boyfriend has them," Teneya retorted. Ziggy smiled brightly at Dillon and held them out. The Outcast Court leaned in as they watched Dillon soften and lean in for a kiss before he took his boxers back from Ziggy.
"No problem," Ziggy replied. "It wasn't like I didn't get a good view of them before."
"And how many times did he see them exactly, Dillon?" Kevin Levin asked as his mates whisted from the audience.
"More times than you've ever seen either Tennyson's underwear." The whole crowd oohed and awed at Dillon's comeback. And the snickering turned to Kevin.
"Shut up," he replied, shoving Anakin.
"I have something I would like to try," Luna said standing up, and going to the CD changer.
"Sure, you have the floor," Ziggy said, as everyone began to move the table of breakfast food up stage.
"Okay, I bite, what's going on?" Murphy asked.
"Oh, if someone wants to do a scene or song, as long as it doesn't take over someone elses we all kind of do it together," Era explained to his older brother.
"So anyone who doesn't participate takes a seat in the audience." Dillon and Tenaya moved to go off stage, as the other's seated themselves in the rows of chairs or on stage props.
"Oh, not you Dillon!" Luna called. "I need you for this, don't worry, you don't have to say much though." Luna took him by the hand, with a chair in the other, and led him to one side of the stage. "Just sit right here, and you'll know your cue when it comes to you."
"Uh, all right, if you say so," Dillon said, taking a seat. Luna directed the others to set up some propts and other things on stage before she cued someone to start up the CD.
"There! Right! There!" she sang. "Look at that tan, that tinted skin. Look at the killer shape he's in. Look at that slightly stubbly chin. Oh Please he's gay, totally gay." Deus leaned over and began to sing along,
"I'm not about to celebrate. Every trait could indicate the totally straight expatriate. This guy's not gay, I say not gay." And then everyone joined in as the ensemble,
"That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to assume that a man who wears perfume is automatically radically fey?"
"But look at his coiffed and crispy locks," Era sang
"Look at his silk translucent socks," Luna added.
"There's the eternal paradox. Look what we're seeing," Deus replied holding up a window with his hands.
"What are we seeing?"
"Is he gay?"
"Of course he's gay!" Luna protested.
"Or European?" Deus asked. The whole cast nodded up slowly as they said,
"ohhhhhh." They began to slowly creep foward as they sang, "Gay or European? It's hard to guarantee Is he gay or European?"
"Well, hey don't look at me," Merlin sang. They all ran around joining in at different parts that fit them.
"You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports. They play peculiar sports.-- In shiny shirts and tiny shorts.Gay or foreign fella? The answer could take weeks.They will say things like "ciao bella" while they kiss you on both cheeks.-- Oh please.--Gay or European? So many shades of gray.-- Depending on the time of day, the French go either way.-- Is he gay or European? or -- There! Right There! Look at that condescending smirk.Seen it on every guy at work.That is a metro hetero jerk.That guy's not gay, I say no way.-- That is the elephant in the room. -- Well is it relevant to presume that a hottie in that costume-- Is automatically-radically-- Ironically chronically-- Certainly pertin'tly-- Genetically medically-- GAY! OFFICIALLY GAY! OFFICIALLY GAY GAY GAY GAY...DAMNIT!-- Gay or European?-- So stylish and relaxed.-- Is he gay or European?-- I think his chest is waxed.-- But they bring their boys up different there. It's culturally diverse. It's not a fashion curse.-- If he wears a kilt or bears a purse. Gay or just exotic? I still can't crack the code.-- Yet his accent is hypnotic but his shoes are pointy toed.-- Huh. Gay or European? So many shades of gray.-- But if he turns out straight I'm free at eight on Saturday.-- Is he gay or European? gay or european? Gay or Euro-"
Era jumped up and yelled, "Wait a minute! Give me a chance to crack this guy.
I have an idea I'd like to try."
"The floor is yours," Deus said waving his arm in front of him.
Era pressed his finger tips together as he walked over to where Dillon was sitting, "So Mr. Argitacos...This alleged affair with Ms. Windam has been going on for...?"
Dillon looked over to Ziggy and said,
"So, what exactly am I supposed to say again?" The entire group let out a breath they had been holding in.
"Nice one, Dillon!" Tenaya called.
"What?! It's not like I've actually seen...what is this?"
"Leagally Blonde the musical," Luna replied. Dillon raised an eye brow at them.
"Exactly how gay are you expecting me to be again?" The group giggled as Luna ran him the play.
"Just follow the lines marked Mikos," she told him. "Sorry about that. Continue Era."
"So," Era began again, "Mr. Argitacos...This alleged affair with Ms. Windam has been going on for...?"
"2 years," Dillon replied.
"And your first name again is...?"
"And your boyfriend's name is...?"
"Ziggy," Dillon replied honestly, before he realized that they wanted more from him. He looked down at the play and read flatly. "I'm sorry! I misunderstand. You say boyfriend. I thought you say best friend. Carlos is my best friend."
"You bastard!" Ziggy screamed, through giggles across stage, beginning to strut towards Dillon. "You lying bastard! That's it. I no cover for you, no more! Peoples. I have a big announcement. This man is Gay and European! you've got to stop your being a completely closet case. No matter what he say. I swear he never ever ever swing the other way. You are so gay. You big parfait! You flaming boy band cabaret."
"I'm straight," Dillon protested half heartedly.
"You were not yesterday. So if I may, I'm proud to say, He's gay!"
"And European and Gay!"
"Fine okay I'm gay!" Dillon said.
"Hooray!" the group sang out as one. After the final note, there was a single, solitary clap from Markus, who didn't quite realized what had just happened, as he was staring at his laptop.
"Now I know why I didn't join theatre," Anakin said. "A lot of really crazy people are in it.
"Oh, that's nothing close to what we do," Ziggy said. "Luna, if I may borrow you as a harpist, please, darling?"
"Of course, your majesty!" Luna replied with a bow. They all rushed around with more intensity, this time rolling out instruments.